I’ve always been fascinated by the stories families tell about each other, particularly when the stories conflict.

The event that occasioned my weaning from the bottle has always been one of my favorites. My father told me his version throughout my childhood to demonstrate what a spirited little thing I was, and I reveled in the drama of the image that the story evoked.

I didn’t think to ask my mother for her version until I was an adult and had a child of my own.

Weaning Baby Liz from the Bottle

According to my father, I was weaned from the bottle on the day that my mother came into my room to get me up from my nap and I was so happy to see her that I tossed my bottle out of the crib with such gay abandon that it smashed on the floor like a wineglass, spraying milk and broken glass all over the room. And my mother vowed, that as God was her witness, Liz would never drink from a bottle again!

My mother’s version of the story is that I woke up from my nap and unscrewed the top from the bottle, dumped the milk on myself, then waited miserably in my wet nightie in my wet crib for someone to come in and clean up the mess.